Why Perfect Stories Don’t Connect

In the world of brand-building and personal leadership, there is an almost magnetic pull toward "the polish."

When I’m working with clients on a pitch deck or refining web copy, I often see a hesitant hand on the brakes when we get to the hard stuff. There is an inclination to scrub the story clean—to avoid the customer’s pain or skip over the grit of the struggle. We want to stay in the light; we want to remain "positive."

I understand that discomfort. Addressing the "hard stuff" feels risky. But there’s a paradox in storytelling that we have to embrace if we want to move people: We don’t actually connect with perfection.

Think about the curated feeds we scroll through every day. Even when we follow those stories of "perfect" lives or "flawless" business launches, there is a lingering distance. A separation. We might admire them, but we don’t see ourselves in them.

Why? Because perfection isn't real. And if it isn't real, it isn't relatable.

The Beauty in the Crack

In Japanese culture, there is an ancient wisdom known as Wabi-sabi—the celebration of imperfection.

When a vase is broken, a practitioner of Wabi-sabi doesn't try to hide the fracture with invisible glue. Instead, they might highlight the crack in gold, making the repair a central part of the piece’s history and beauty. The mindset is simple yet profound: the imperfection is exactly what makes the piece more beautiful.

When we apply this to our own narratives—whether it’s a brand story or a personal one—everything changes.

When we stop trying to hide the "flaws" in our character or the "pain points" our products solve, we invite the audience in. We move from being a distant entity to a resonant human experience. By leaning into our "perfectly imperfect" humanity, we create the space for others to truly see and hear us.

Setting the Tension

Every great story—from the brands that change the world to the movies that make us cry—requires tension. A story without a problem isn’t a story; it’s a brochure.

Being real about challenges and flaws isn't a weakness; it is your invitation for others to join you.

Try This: A Practice in Authenticity

This week, I invite you to look at the narrative you’re putting out into the world.

• Identify the "Flaw": Think of one specific tension or "pain" you’ve been trying to hide in your customer’s journey or your own story.

• Reframe the Narrative: What if that specific imperfection is actually the bridge to your audience?

• Share the Gold: How might sharing that challenge authentically create a deeper, more lasting connection?

Our stories are how we share our meaning with the world. Don't be afraid to show the cracks—that’s where the light gets in.

Remember, being real about your challenges is how you ensure you are truly seen.